I’m itching to blog about something. It’s been almost a year since I posted anything. I visited at least 12 new countries since and have a laundry list of stories I want to share. So why am I writing about bucket lists? Because this crap takes much less time and thinking to write! It also sums up the theme of the past few years.

You see, I am quite the late bloomer. I had my first bf at 26 and I never set foot in a gay bar till I was 27. I finally came out at 28. I got over my internalized homophobia at 30. It wasn’t really till I broke up with my first bf at 31 that I went out venturing into the big wild gay world. And venture I did. Every time I heard something somewhat interesting I would add it to this list. These will range from prudish to outrageous. Superficial as the gay world may be it was fun to go through some of them. I am at 20 out of 30 and satisfied for now. How about you? Leave me a comment with your number or give me more to add to the list!

Go on a gay cruise

Attended my first one this year. I think every gay person should try this experience  at least once. I’ll link to the post here when I write it.

Come out

Try not to do it over email like I did.

Buy your first sex toy 

There’s nothing like walking up to the cashier with 2 pounds of lube, 3 bottles of poppers, a giant dildo, and the 50 shades of gray game set. Just saying.

Have a threesome

The trick here is for all three to really be into each other. My first and only one was actually accidental.

Participate in group sex (4+ ppl)

Do I look like I spent theee minutes at a masked orgy made up of a gym fit crowd only? I won’t answer that.

Go to a circuit party

Quarterly or yearly massive party events that take place in different cities. Filled with party queens. It’s all about the drugs here, and the abs, and the sex, and, well, the drugs. Don’t expect any of the music to contain more than two words, don’t expect to feel good looking, and don’t expect to get any smarter at these events 😉

Go to Berghain/Lab in Berlin

I have heard this referred to as the gay Mecca. Nobody seems to be able to describe it other than to say you will never find anything shocking again and you won’t leave it the same person you were when you got in – if you get in – past the world’s scariest looking bouncer Sven.

Go to a gay strip club

5 minutes on Grindr will probably expose you to 100 times more explicit content than what you would see at a strip club. But why not try it an old fashioned way?

Get a gay massage

The stuff that happy endings are made of. A skilled one will tantalize you and numb your brain.

PNP (party and play)

Also referred to as chem sex, hi fun, and a hundred other nicknames. This a good one to skip.

Join a gay sports team

A common complaint is that people don’t have enough gay friends. This is the best place to do it. What makes it gay sport? Sometimes the  people and sometimes, well, just the sport itself. Think water polo, beach volleyball, and the gayest sport on earth: synchronized diving. Why jump alone when you could be doing it right next to a wet, almost naked, toned guy.

Visit at least one gay landmark

Some ideas: Castro Camera/HRC Store (SFO), Stonewall Inn (NYC), Dr. Frank Kameny’s Home (DC), Gay and Lesbian Holocaust Memorial (Sydney), Gay Holocaust Memorial (Berlin), Oscar Wilde Statue (Dublin), Homomonument (Amsterdam)

Attend your first pride parade

My absolute favorite so far has been the Amsterdam one where the parade takes place inside and around the canals. Full post here.

Go to an S&M bar

You may not be into it. I’m not. But do go
and go with a friend you trust. It may come in handy if you decide to participate. All about losing control and testing your limits here.

Go to a leather bar

It will smell like the Swiss countryside but somehow it can still be a turn on.

Go to a bear bar

Again even if it’s not your thing. My experience is that bears (formerly me) are the nicest and funniest people around.

See a drag show

Yes they can be intimidating. No I don’t understand their fascination with being two times as tall and wide as any woman. Overt the top fun (literally).

Flip flop

This one is easy. Be a top then a bottom with the same guy in the same session.

Try a new role

This is for the crowd that tends to be more rigid. Top if you’re more of a bottom. Bottom if you’re more of a top.

Go cruising

Before Grindr and the hundred gay apps on the market now, people would just go to cruising areas and pick up guys. In fact many of these places still exist. It can be a lot more exciting than being on a phone. I did say can be (as in sometiems). It can be quite creepy.

Watch your first gay film, gay show, or read your first gay novel

This one is for the youngsters. Some favorites of mine: Beautiful Thing, Brokeback Mountain, Yoshi & Jagger, Milk, Philadelphia

Visit a gay sauna/bathhouse/hot spring

My favorite so far is Babylon in Bangkok. Not the cleanest, but I’m not a big fan of saunas and this one is at least a social experience with a pool, bar, lounge, restaurant, gym, and people from everywhere around the world.

Get fetishy

Leather, rubber, rope, armpits, uniforms, water sports, food, feet, socks…there must be one of these you can get into. Maybe just a naughty seesaw?

Get raunchy

Peep/glory holes, outdoor sex, cream pies, golden showers, double penetration, etc etc.

I won’t judge you if you try one of these. Your mother probably will.

Make a sex video

Be like Paris Hilton. For gods sake though, watch it with your partner and destroy the evidence immediately. Or post it online and brag about it, your choice.

Make out with a girl

I will admit to this being on my to do list. And to go all the way if possible. I’m all for trying everything once. Even the gross p word.

Try a paid escort

What’s wrong with the world’s oldest profession? Nothing.

Attend a couple of gay festivals/events

Some ideas: Gay Days Disney Orlando, Folsom Street Fair San Francisco, Southern Decadenance New Orleans, Chicago Market Days, Sydney Mardi Gras, Songkran Bangkok, Gaybigaygay Austin, Burning Man Nevada, World Gay Rodeo New Mexico, Queer Contact Machester, Berlinale Teddy Award, Berlin Gay and Lesbian Festival, Lou Queernaval Nice, Pink Week Slovenia, Milkshake Festval Amsterdam, Fringe Fesival Scotland, The Outing Ireland

Go to a nude beach

All I can imagine in my head is old wrinkly flaccid penises strolling and creeping around. But I hear there are some good ones, especially in Barcelona.

Attend a black gay pride event

Show some support. Atlanta, Dallas, and Washington DC host these at three different times during the year.

Date a much younger guy

Ok the benefits here can be quite obvious. Keep it legal please.

Date a much older guy 

Tired of the same old shit? Do this and I can promise you at least one thing. Perspective. That or just good karma.